Monday, February 22, 2010

When rude people are allowed out.

Can I smoke?
What can I say? You're outside, you're entitled to.
Well, you say no, I won't smoke.
Well, I can't say no, we're outside, you can if you want.

I'm simultaneously interested and offended that I don't qualify for an interrogation. Her table is directly midpoised between ours, yet my response is void. Possibly only having coffee disqualifies me from the ranks of potentially offended diners.

Well I'll just turn this way.

Thanks, lady. It wasn't enough for you that I'm downwind of your odious cigarette, now you want to turn and face me, too.

Forget tasers, I need a flamethrower.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

no, that would just make more smoke. You need a water pistol.

Unknown said...

No no no, Lightsaber!

This is why I eat at home as often as possible. There, only my wife blows smoke in my face.

Anonymous said...

As a reformed smoker... I am sorry for all of them and I agree completely!

Madame DeFarge said...

I recall a Steve Martin routine where he said if asked by someone if he minded them smoking, he said, no, but did they mind if he farted. Always springs to mind when I see smokers.

Juliana said...

I HATE when people are rude, hate when they are smoking in your face. ESP when I have my son with me. I just cough up a storm, tell them that i have already had cancer once and it was not a walk in the park and to kindly keep their cancer stick to themselves!